Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Seven Tips to Helping Someone who is Unemployed

Many of us will have family or friends who are going through a difficult time during a period of unemployment. In a review of the research on couples with one unemployed spouse, there was no direct correlation between unemployment and marital dissatisfaction (Barling, 1990). This seems counterintuitive, since we might think that unemployment would lead to greater conflicts in a marriage. However, unemployment can also lead to a recognition and appreciation for the support a marriage can bring and some marriages can actually get stronger.

How Can You Help?

  1. Talk about it and validate it.

Many unemployed people feel ashamed of their situation.They often feel that other people look down on them, think of them as a burden, and don't want to hear what is going on. They may also feel, "you don't know what I am going through." As a friend of family member it is important to allow time and space for opening up. Suimply saying, "I know this is a rough time for you. I want you to know I am here. If you want to talk I am hear to listen. This is a time I can really be on your side."

For six more tips for turning unemployment into an opportunity to improve a marriage, stay tuned to the South Bay Wellnes Connection Blog, and check out www.stillwatergroup.net for help on other issues affecting families and friends.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Experience Lorraine DiGiovanni,Conversations with the Other Side

Have you ever felt that you have unfinished business with loved ones who are no longer with us?Curious about how they are doing and if they have any wisdom to give you to help you live a happier, more fulfilling life? Need to heal old wounds?

Not sure that this is possible? Skeptical? Believer?

Me, too. All of the above. I can recommend a session with Lorraine DiGiovanni, who is a gifted "spiritualist" and energy practioner. Deeply intuitive, and compassionate, Lorraine takes you through a safe and not scary process that opens a door to the wherever it is we go when we leave our bodies. If you are feeling stuck with a relationship that ended prematurely, this is a way to resolve old issues and move on with your life. Of course, I am a fan of psychotherapy as a path to healing, but sometimes talking directly to that lost someone can reduce the hours on the couch!

Lorraine can be reached at (310)376-3114, or by email at lorraine.digiovanni@verizon.net. Let me know what you think. Virginia Green, PhD, info@creativityunwrapped.com.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Stress and the Dodgers: How to cope with Loss...


The Dodgers are seven games out of first place in the Western Division. What does this have to do with you?

According to today's Daily Breeze, people drink more beer at Dodger Stadium when their team is losing than when they are winning. Why?

  1. When we are winning we want to stay with the game -- we don't want to miss anything.

  2. When we are losing, the game is at best boring, and maybe even depressing, so we want to escape, but they won't let us go out into the parking lot and run around and come bak.

  3. A big margin of loss breed hopelessness, despite the Dodgers' eighth inning theme song, "don't stop believing."

As usual, baseball is like life. Success is a wonderful indicator of happiness. The more successful we feel, the happier we are, the more connected, involved, energetic. And success is a state of mind. Baseball has a pretty definite idea of success -- are we winning or not? Life is a little less well defined, thank God.

We get to decide what means success for us, right this minute. Some days getting out of bed and getting in the shower and calling a friend is success. Some days it's nailing that $10,000 project. Somedays it's a sacrifice fly, some days it's a home run. Almost doesn't matter, as long as we experience a little success every day.

How were you successful already today?



Monday, June 28, 2010

Want Better Health Care? Ask for Results!

Do you have any idea why health care costs keep spiralling upward? One reason is because simple and easy solutions often take a back seat to complicated and expensive. Why?

Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center (CCHMC) is one institution that has implemented its own version of health-care reform, taking overall performance levels from well below average to the top 10 percent in the industry.

One of the key players is Dr. Uma Kotagal, a neonatologist with a deep-seated passion for improving the quality of care at CCHMC. In 1996, when Jim Anderson was named CEO, he convinces Kotagal to lead the hospital's improvement efforts as senior vice president of quality and transformation. Anderson, a practicing attorney with expertise in the quality improvement methods used by manufacturing firms, is joined by Chairman of the Board Lee Carter, who articulates his vision for the hospital as, "We will be the best at getting better."

The improvement effort at CCHMC gains real traction in 2002 with the award of a $1.9 million Pursuing Perfection grant from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation. In addition to funding an improvement-science training program, the grant requires that the hospital undertake improvement projects.

Hence, Kotagal develops hospital-wide protocols with proven efficacy—for example, implementing a "forcing function" into the operating room process that keeps patients out of the OR until they've received antibiotics, thus reducing surgical site infections. For another project, she selects the hospital's Cystic Fibrosis (CF) Clinic, in part because its head physician was the only division leader who showed any interest in participating in improvement initiatives.
Because grant guidelines required CCHMC to disclose its performance, however, the CF Clinic's participation resulted in some serious soul-searching. Founded in 1883 as an academic medical center, CCHMC had considered itself to be among the best hospitals in the country, even though it had scant evidence to benchmark its performance against others. But data co-collected by the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation instead showed that the outcome for the clinic's juvenile patients measured at the 20th percentile. So hospital staff tackled the situation head-on, finding that the data galvanized families rather than angering them. The clinic went on to change its processes and communications based on input from seventeen patient-parent team members. Six years later, CF patient outcomes had risen to the 90th percentile.

A key takeaway is the power of transparency as a mechanism for change. Another is the motivational value of benchmarking themselves to an internal standard of zero accidents instead of rationalizing poor performance as an unavoidable consequence of the complexity of patient care.

Kotagal's efforts to create a culture of improvement throughout the hospital include the use of employees who serve as internal quality improvement consultants, as well as an in-house education program on improvement science that emphasizes rapid cycles of small-scale change.

Their finding that an accumulation of small changes can add up to significant gains is leading the way for health-care reform that is just as revolutionary as its legislative equivalent.

Monday, May 17, 2010

The Dangers of Not Knowing Whatsup

Top Ten Tips to Communicating with Your Teen!!

How to Make the Internet a Powerful Ally!

Why Just Say No is not enough...

Five things your teen isn't telling you.

Five Week Parenting Group
Tuesdays, 7:00-8:15
2100 Sepulveda, Suite 30
Manhattan Beach, CA 90266
(310)378-2520

Friday, March 19, 2010

Critical Mental Health Services needed in Haiti

International experts are encouraging the Haitian Health Ministry, which they say is receptive and eager for help, to incorporate mental health care into the primary health care system and to make it available throughout the country.

Right now, though, the need for psychological first aid and emergency psychiatric treatment is so acute that foreign psychiatrists are seeing patients, setting up programs and rapidly training Haitian doctors, nurses and community workers in everything from psychopharmacology to group relaxation techniques. (Before the quake, there were only about 15 psychiatrists in all of Haiti.)

The foreign psychiatrists emphasize that they have found Haitians to be impressively resilient, but the disaster has nonetheless set off reactions ranging from anxiety through psychosis. Most worrisome are cases like that of Guerda Joseph, a 41-year-old woman who tumbled into a catatonic depression shortly after she was pulled from the rubble of her home. Mute and nearly immobilized ever since, she lies on floral sheets at the General Hospital, her Bible tucked beside her pillow, her 25-year-old adopted son by her side day and night.

More common, though, is what Dr. Lynne Jones, a child psychiatrist and disaster expert with the International Medical Corps, calls “earthquake shock,” a persistent sensation that the earth is still shaking, which makes the heart race and causes chest pain.

“This is an understandable response, and it’s important to let people know, ‘You are not crazy,’ ” Dr. Jones said. “I use a kind of metaphor: ‘Your body has a very effective fire alarm. One of the reasons you’re alive today is that it went off during the earthquake. You ran out of that building. Great, you survived. Unfortunately, the fire alarm is now sensitive and goes off when you don’t want it to, or maybe it never shut off.’ ”

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Live from Statewide Meeting of California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists

Live from the state meeting of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, February 7, 2010

Major Trends affecting associations in 2010: (from Peggy Hoffman, industry consultant and guru on organizations)

1) Organizations are becoming “Adhocracies.” Goal is to have 1 in 5 members volunteering for small discreet tasks as part of teams, not committees.

Provide volunteers with: Value (enriching experiences), time constrained tasks, the opportunity to control their own time

2) Joining an organization is a decision to AFFILIATE, participate in a MISSION, realize OUTCOMES – not save money or learn something!

3) We are in a people driven economy, where we can communicate at any time, where we have control over our own message, and where we can invite collaboration. AND, we need to stay FLUID – not expecting today’s media to be the same tomorrow.

4) Co-Creation drives organizations: crowdsourcing, where our members create the events – the board invites them to do it., and gives up a little control in the process…

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Vision and Well Being



As you enter this new year, you may be in the process of “visioning.” Vision creates all kinds of outcomes in our lives. Very often we consciously "envision" wealth and proserpity and goals well met in our careers and business lives.

How we envision our lives contibutes enormously to our sense of well being. Do you "see" a bright future? Do you feel yourself healthy, well balanced and vibrant? These thoughts and feelings contain the seed of your future. Whatever you see or believe today is exactly what you will project and see and receive tomorrow.

Unfortuantely, if we talk a lot about the bad economy, the lack of opportunity, and tight finances, we are going to feel very constricted, which attracts even more lack and negativity.

In this challenging world, it is increasing important to monitor your thoughts and feelings, and, when they are positive, build on them, and if they are negative, take action to shift them.

A common grounding exercise is a "vision board." Collect magazines and print media and find images and words that uplift and motivate you. Cut them out and put then in piles. On a sheet of paprer or core foam board, lay out your images in a way that pleases you. You might want to look at how these words related to your career, business, money, health, relationships and goals. Get the “picture” of what you want over this next year.

Then, keep focusing on it! What you focus on expands, so become aware of your focus.

If you find it difficult to maintain that positive focus you might like to join a community who focuses on providing support and encouragement to live passionately and prosperously. We're inernational and local at www.firedupforsuccess.com.

Get excited! Look at what inspires you. What would you love to happen…even if you have no idea how that would occur? What are you passionate about? Love, passion and enthusiasm makes for a powerful attractive force.

Build your life around these feelings and your sense of well being will translate intoi powerful results!




Welcome to 2010!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Universal Health Care



Dr. Virginia Green:

I met with Ann Connolly, expert on the economics of health care reform, this weekend while I was in New York. I totally trust her brains and experience on this issue, and she made the excellent and very clear point that it is critical that as many people as possible are involved in the health care world. Today, young healthy people are often not enrolled. This is the population that should be subsidizing the less healthy population, which is how insurance is supposed to work. If the auto insurance industry only required bad drivers to have insurance, there would not be enough money to pay claims: it is good drivers that pay claims. Might not seem fair to good drivers, but there are more of us than bad drivers, so the risk is spread over a bigger population. And car insurance protects us, too.

Both the House and Senate health care reform bills include universal health coverage, which is critical to any plan. By the way, universal health care will provide everyone with access to affordable mental health services -- one of the best guarantors of wellness.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Introducing the South Bay's newest and liveliest Wellness Connection

Please join us as we help you explore the world of healing in creative ways that take the best we know from science and interpret and personalize to your need for alternatives and extensions of traditional medicine. We are five professional women with lots of credentials: education (more diplomas from real schools!), experience (tens of thousands working with real people!), and a sincere calling to help YOU with ideas for making the changes you want to make to live a healthier, happier life. Oh, yes, that's something we have in common -- we take our work very seriously, but we believe in the pursuit of happiness, as a goal and as a process.

You will find out more about us as the weeks unfold, and we welocome your questions so we can learn more about you, too. This week's focus is on Mental Health, and your humble blogger is Dr. Virginia Green, Executive Director of Stillwater Family Therapy in Manhattan Beach, where we believe that caring for your mental health is the best thing you can do for your family, friends, and community.